Monday, September 16, 2013

I'm Back

This has been a very tough summer.  Losing Lulu took a lot out of me.  I have been very lonely and down in the dumps and often cried at the drop of a hat.  I was lucky that Barry was home several times throughout the summer and I went to see him when I needed to get away.

I had trouble weeding this summer because every time I went outside, I expected to see Lulu.  It was hard to dig weeds and see the beetles and worms that she would have loved to eat.  It seems like a chore now that she isn't there to egg me on. 

The wasps have been especially ferocious this year.  I have never been stung before but both Barry and I have been stung three times each. They are everywhere!  I got stung digging garlic and also while picking a plum.  Many outdoor chores are best done early in the morning before the sun rises over the mountain or in the evening when they seem to have settled for the night.

As a result of both missing Lulu and fighting off the wasps, my garden did not do too well.  By the time Barry was here to help out, the weeds had more or less taken over.  We did have some successes - cukes, cabbage and tomatoes did well.  In fact, the cukes went crazy after a very slow start.  I have been giving away at least two grocery bags of them a week!  We have eaten tons ourselves (I love Greek Salad!) and made some relish, etc.

I was disappointed with the corn this year.  I didn't plant my regular variety and found this year's corn too starchy.  Plus I had trouble enjoying corn on the cob this year because Lulu was always there to share it in the past.  It just seemed to stick in my throat. 

I have been making jam and juice as well as freezing fruit for later use but haven't taken any pictures so those recipes will not make it to my blog.  I have had trouble staying focused on blogging.

I am doing somewhat better now but still find I get teary-eyed now and then.  Last week at the grocery store, I had trouble when one of the clerks asked me about Lulu.  I hadn't seen her since Lulu died so she was unaware.  She would always ask me, "How's your baby?" and tell me that she told her kids and other relatives about Lulu.  It was hard to tell her about Lulu without breaking down in the checkout line.

I have quite a few photos of stops with Lulu on the trip in June for my parents' 60th anniversary.  I will be posting them since so many of your seemed to enjoy Lulu's adventures. 

I will be slowing down my blogging as I don't have much gardening happening and I haven't recorded very many recipes.  I don't plan to stop but may not be as regular as I have been.

I thank all of you who sent kind words or called to offer your sympathy.  My sweet little chicken is firmly entrenched in my heart.  I miss her so.


6 comments:

  1. Oh, hang in there. We all miss Lulu too. I'm typing this with tears in my eyes. Would you consider getting more hens? I had a favorite and never thought another could take her place. But today, I do have another favorite. I'll be heart broken the day I lose her. But I know there will be other special hens.

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    1. I have thought about getting more chickens. I was toying with the idea of getting 2 bantams of some sort while they are young and try to train them to be house chickens. I'm just not sure about having chickens that can move fast in the house. Lulu was a special case and I don't know if that could happen again. I have questions in my mind about travelling with a pair of chickens - it might not work that well, as Lulu stayed put and was content to just be where she could see me. I'm still in the thinking stage about all this.

      I would also like more hens as egg-layers but we need to redo the pen, etc to make it predator proof but that is hard to do because Barry works away. Since he doesn't always get enough time to come home for days off, I go see him and would take the new chickens just like I did with Lulu. If I had more, I would have to find someone reliable to look after them while I was gone or not be able to see Barry as often.

      I'll just take it day by day.

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  2. Oh Joan.....my heart is breaking for you. I think you are on the right track. Just let things go for now. We can manage without you for a while if you need to stop blogging for a while. Just heal. And cry at the drop of a hat. And miss her. And see her in everything you do. And then one day, it won't feel so sharp and acute. You will remember her without the cutting pain. And then you'll be able to talk about her...and maybe laugh remembering something she did....and it's like you get them back in your life.

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    1. Thanks for your kind words Erin. Sounds like you and speaking from experience. I know I am on the mend as Barry and I can talk about her and laugh at her antics sometimes. I just get very choked up telling about her getting sick when people ask about her.

      I have put a bunch of her photos that I love as my screensaver and they are a comfort to me. I remember all the good times we had. I first thought that it might hurt more to see the pics but I find if I see them, I don't feel quite so lonely without her.

      I have longer stretches of doing fine before something sets me off. Healing I am but hard it is.

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  3. Sending hugs Joan, it takes an awful long time to grieve for ones so loved xxxx

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    1. Thanks Rachy. I know you understand.

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